Work through issues, don't just give up. This is the pre-conception phase. Instead of taking it personally, you may have to address a few insecurities about your partner not finding you sexually attractive or not desiring sex. As I mentioned a bit in another thread, aces have a harder time than most finding a partner. So for a long time, he was very frustrated, and I would always wonder why he was so testy. This is honestly what gives me the most confidence that this could be a really successful site and contribution to people seeking non-sexual relationships webwide. The amount by which it is more difficult must be compensated for by putting more effort into finding a relationship. If someone asks me on a date, I'll typically blurt it out without even thinking because I don't want anyone getting uncomfortable or pushing me into something that I don't want. Maybe you can try out open or non-monogamous types of relationships.
That said, Okcupid is still a brilliant dating site - and if others feel like it's good enough, please do voice that opinion. So really, our relationships may not be too much different from any other relationship. Many of us want monogamy just like anyone else, and pushing for an open relationship can make your partner feel like they aren't enough for you or that you don't really want them. Listen to and understand your partner's side of things. It could make development go alot quicker, and the more input on features, desgin, etc, the more suited to asexuals I believe it would become. People commonly believe mismatched sexual attraction or needs cause relationships to fail. Yes, relationships where partners have mismatched sexual needs are challenging. A lot of drama could have been avoided if he would have been more open about his needs from the beginning. Asexuals are people who feel little to no sexual attraction. We are willing to talk about it and make things work. I think we as asexuals could use a new dating site. Tweet A chalk drawing of two figures with a heart between them on a blackboard. Just remember to love and support your partner no matter what. But there's a big difference between working harder and working smarter. Sometimes this involves going back to the drawing board several times to revise a compromise or agreement in the relationship. I have been assaulted because I didn't "put out" and I'm constantly afraid that it will happen again, and many asexuals have been through the same things. However, it was very encouraging to see the number of people who showed interest in helping support the project! You just have to remember that asexuality is a varied experience. All relationships require effort. They are asexual because they are asexual. Instead of pressure and blame, opt for open communication. I've put up a brief explanation of the difference between a paid and free account on Asexualitic on post 41 of this topic. Remember, no means no. They even offer an asexual option, yet I'm still considering developing something similar for asexuals for the following reasons: The model I have in mind is line with the very successful match-making site Okcupid. Additionally, if anyone else has an interest in heading a similar project - I'd be glad to lend my support. After all the feedback receieve thus far in this thread, as well as through the poll, I've decided to forego organizing a new dating site for those seeking non-sexual relationships at this time.
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