Sixty-six percent of Italians, Spaniards, Mexicans and South Africans reach orgasm almost every time. This issue often comes up when the couple has what is called mismatched libidos. Another problem of estimating sexual frequency is that people often only consider sexual intercourse as having sex. Does frequency really matter when it comes to having a "good" sex life? This can result in a vicious circle where they often start avoiding sex all together. If your relationship is in trouble, getting help when you are struggling is extremely important.
This issue often comes up when the couple has what is called mismatched libidos. Still, averages mean there are some people above and some people below any given number, and they don't help decide the question of what is right for an individual. Lots of long-term relationships see libidos bottom out during busy, stressful or child-rearing times. However, the partner who wants sex less frequently can often feel pressured and inadequate. These sound like simple questions, but there are no right answers. They wanted to know what they should do. Larger text size Very large text size Two of the most common questions I am asked by my clients are "How much sex is normal? But people who believed they were having less sex than their peers were unhappier than those who believed they were having as much or more. It is actually quite common for a couple to have different levels of desire and it does not generally reflect a lack of love. Advertisement In my experience there are happy couples who have sex every day, have sex once a week or once a month. Best Health Staff photo credit: Another problem of estimating sexual frequency is that people often only consider sexual intercourse as having sex. Does frequency really matter when it comes to having a "good" sex life? This can result in a vicious circle where they often start avoiding sex all together. Can we really expect to meet somebody who satisfies all the requirements we want in a relationship and who also has exactly the same sex drive? For them companionship, trust and mutual reliability are often more important than lots of steamy sex. But in my experience, when couples stop having sex their relationship can be overtaken by feelings of anger, disappointment and detachment which can lead to infidelity or divorce. Men tend to respond to the sensual touch, taste, smell or visual cues. Less sex doesn't automatically equate to less love, happiness and fulfilment, especially for couples who have been together for a long time. Many other activities can be considered sex, such as oral sex, genital touching, mutual masturbation or just affectionate behaviour such as kissing, cuddling, caressing and holding hands. Not everyone has the courage to tell a partner how to kiss or perform oral sex. It sounds unsexy but I advise my clients to schedule sex so the low-libido partner doesn't feel pressured and the higher-libido partner doesn't feel rejected. After all, a couple's sex life is affected by so many different factors: Find out how to tell how much sex is right for you and your partner. It's not a matter of quantity but quality.
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How Long Should Sex Last?
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